Return of the Rumour Mill

Let's just start off by saying that there is no foundation in the above rumour about Maradona Jnr coming to The Den but he seems to be being hawked around every other club at the moment and we were feeling a bit left out...

Incoming!!
Well, Graham Stack arrived from Arsenal for a year-long jaunt in "The Championship" so we managed to get something right. But so far, the only other signings of any note have been Jody Morris and Andy Marshall, who decided that he really was better off signing a new contract at The Den, rather than try his luck elsewhere and probably fail miserably.

However, according to Chairman Theo Paphitis, we're on the verge of signing three new players, one of which has already signed but can't actually announce the details of the transaction until his current club have completed business elsewhere. Sounds a bit iffy to us so we'll just have to satisfy our lust for transfer glory with the news that Paul Shaw might well be on his way back to The Den.

Shaw - who has no hair but we don't care - is currently enjoying a lull in his career with Sheffield United and is very keen to return down south. Whether or not this is true remains to be seen, but the only other alternative is a £30,000 move to sunny Doncaster...

If he does decide to return, he may well be linking up with one of his former team-mates at Gillingham. The latest rumours to be coming from The Den is that Dennis Wise is about to make a bid for Patrick Agyemang and/or Marnady Sidibe...

Not Coming!!
We're sorry to inform you that Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink will not be coming to The Den after all. Apparently he's gone to that other club in the UEFA Cup beginning with "M-I"...

We've also been turned down by Stan Lazaridis, Neil Clement and Graeme Le Saux, who all wanted real money instead of a box of Ryman's pencils while Teddy Sheringham decided to piss on his Millwall Legend status by joining those swines at Upton Park.

Dearly Departed
It has been a sad couple of weeks for us at The Den. First Robbie Ryan left to join Bristol Rovers thanks to some kid playing Championship Manager, then Tony Warner went and joined Cardiff City (careers on the up? I don't think so...). Now Tim Cahill has left to become a Toffee... Still, could've been worse. He could have become an Eagle, so let's be thankful for small mercies.

Oh, and before we go, Darren Ward isn't off. He missed the friendly against Swindon Town because someone decided to kick a ball into his face at training. Relax, girls, the damage isn't permanent...